I haven’t posted on this topic in a while. Gender roles. Women nowadays like to believe that beat into others’ heads that they are equal to men on every level. This is true to some point. We rightfully deserve the same political rights, our opinions rightly have the same impact in voting ballots as do those of men, and other such things. But really, ladies do you honestly think that men and women are one and the same? We’re just not. And here’s a newsflash – we weren’t designed to be on the same level. Our bodies are different, our ways of thinking is different, our perception of the world is different, just about everything about us is different from men!

I recently read an article about a study suggesting that there is no glass ceiling. Men aren’t holding women back from the top jobs and the top wages and the male-dominated industries. Women are holding women back. And I wouldn’t think of it as holding ourselves back, even, I’d think of it as staying in a position where we are the most happy with our careers and life in general.

Let’s face it – most women are not anywhere close to being emotionally stable or heck, even logical with our emotions. We act on what we feel, often on impulse. Life is an emotional roller coaster for us and I, for one, love it. I don’t wanna be a friggin CEO of some big-name company and be stressed out 24/7 about that upcoming meeting with a super grumpy important client tomorrow!

Men and women are driven by completely different motivations.

“When you ask women what they want from work, they place great emphasis on the quality of their relationships at work and on working with people, not things,” says Pinker. “An interest and an ability to contribute to a field are more powerful drivers for women, on average, than higher salaries, job security and benefits. Having a position of power is their lowest priority.”

– clinical psychologist, Susan Pinker

This isn’t to say, of course, that all women are like this. According to Pinker, about 20% of women are focused on their careers and will devote themselves to their job completely as a man would. They do just as well as and often better than their male colleagues.

“But the majority of women have a broader view of happiness that’s not usually compatible with reaching the extremes of their profession.”

Women tend to consistently rate themselves as being happier with their careers than men, as has been found by economists in Canada, Britain, the U.S., Sweden, and Japan – despite taking home less pay. Not only that, but as women rise up to the level of their male colleagues on the corporate ladder, their satisfaction drops to male levels.

In reality, we aren’t being held back. We are simply staying on the level which keeps us happy and satisfied with our lives. Personally, I wouldn’t want it any other way.

Source: Telegraph

First, I’d like to point out that I am not writing this with the intention of insulting another blog. In fact, this blog is very admirable and has tons of great thoughts and information. I simply disagree with this particular part of it and am choosing to express my own views on the subject.

Many PUA blogs I’ve read mention that women are weaker and more vulnerable than men emotionally, spiritually, and physically. Ok physically, most of the time, sure. But emotionally? Women indulge more in feelings than a lot of men do, true, but does that make us weak? No. It makes us expressive and yes, a lot of the time it makes us act before we think. Kind of like a lot of men do when they suddenly feel rage. Women tend to be more open with others and more empathic than men. But weak and more vulnerable spiritually? I read a very nice blog post on a blog titled The Flowered Path about anger. Most of the post made a lot of sense and it was truly a great read. The post went a bit into spirituality and awareness, which is a topic I’m very interested in.

But then I got to this paragraph:

Women are smaller, weaker, and more emotionally vulnerable. It’s a scienitific fact that they experience stress and fear more frequently and intensely than men. And they base a lot of their self-esteem on their looks – a very shakey, insecure foundation. Seeing this objectively, it’s absolutely absurd to let a woman “hurt” your feelings or make you upset. She’s a little girl inside, and is probably fearful of me, and unsure of herself.

Ok let’s go to the first sentence. I agree to a degree. We’re usually smaller, physically weaker, and more prone to allowing emotions to control our actions. But is following our emotions a ‘bad’ or weak thing in any way? I do not think so. In fact, I place great value on people of both genders who are able to express their emotions freely. It shows that they’re comfortable with what they feel and with expressing both positive and negative feelings instead of bottling them up.

Why is it so absurd to let a woman hurt you? Are women too small and weak and pathetic to have any influence on a man’s feelings? I would understand if the author stated that it is absurd to let anyone hurt you, or even that it is absurd to let a certain type of woman hurt you – after all, that would suggest that the author is his own person who refuses to be swayed by the cutting words or actions of others, which is an admirable quality.

But why is it absurd to let a woman, specifically, hurt you? We’re smaller physically and we’re more feeling-oriented, but this does not make us any less worthy of being able to influence a man’s emotions both negatively and positively to the same extent that another man in the same position might. After all, if a man considers us to be too small and weak and childish and unworthy to hurt him emotionally, how can we be worthy to make him happy, help him grow, and nurture him?

FreeVerse of Penetrating Life has recently wrote a very nice blog post about the qualities that attract him to a woman. I was extremely pleased (and surprised) to find that looks was not on the list. Of course, looks are important, that’s a given. But it’s nice to see a post once in a while that focuses on deeper things – things that don’t fade with age. Be sure to read his post here.

It has recently dawned on me that men are less evolved than women. We all know that women mature faster than men do. Heck, in 5th grade most of the girls tend to be taller than their male counterparts. What we never realized, however, is that the slow maturity in men isn’t only true for each individual separately…but for the entire gender. That’s right, men evolve slower than women, making them closer to apes than females. See diagram 1.0 below.

HAIR
Men are much more hairy than women – in fact, they have hair EVERYWHERE! It cannot be denied that the majority of women will never grow as much hair as men. Men and apes are very much alike in that respect.

MULTI TASKING
Also like apes, the man’s brain lacks the ability to multi task unless it involved having a remote in one hand and a beer in the other at the same time. Even then, they are likely to never be able to sip and change the channel at the same time.

When women work on a task, they tend to make more connections, while men tend to channel their attention (e.g. Moir and Jessel, 1992). Men look for the abstract and theoretical, dissociating it from distracting information, while women see a larger context and are better at understanding and predicting human action, and sensing motives and emotion. This ability to multitask and to consider other sources of information should stand women in good stead as they collaborate on work of social value.

http://www.barnard.columbia.edu/bcrw/womenandwork/pfirman.htm

UNCONTROLLABLE URGE TO MATE
Men also find it extremely difficult to break out of their instinct to mate with anything and everything they see. While women are evolved enough to be able to break free of their mating urges and read a book or have a nice conversation with a man without wanting to jump his bones, men, like apes, find that their sole purpose in life is to have as much sex as possible. They are unable to take part in greater intellectual activities and focus on those activities without feeling their urge to stick something somewhere…anywhere…

AGGRESSIVENESS

It must also be pointed out that men tend to be physically stronger than women. Women are delicate creatures. Many of us aren’t pushovers, but we cannot deny that on the whole, men can overpower us physically. Because our brains are more evolved than those of men, we find less need to use pointless brute force to achieve our means. Instead, we choose to employ our advanced mental problem solving skills. Men, like apes, rely on physical strength to achieve their goals – they are more aggressive than women, who choose to stay on the sidelines and indulge in intellectual activities such as talking in coherent sentences.

COMMUNICATION

Speaking of which, men also have the infamous habit of grunting things out rather than saying them. They can be taught to parrot things out in specific ways, but rarely employ this ability to actually learn to speak what is on their minds in a way that their more evolved female counterparts might understand. Grunting and making animal-like noises is, too, a known trait of apes.

As we can see, some of the ways in which men are less evolved than women and are closer to apes include:

1) Their extremely hairy bodies.
2) Their inability to multi task.
3) Their constant need for sex as opposed to mentally rewarding activities.
4) Their aggressiveness and their use of brute force to achieve their goals rather than being able to find a more peaceful, intelligent solution.
5) Their lack of the ability to produce coherent speech.

But not to worry, ladies, there is hope. Perhaps in a few thousand years, men will catch up to our evolved selves and make for more mentally stimulating partners. For now, we’ll just have to care for them as we care for our beloved pets – gentle love, communication through basic commands, and regular feeding times. What more could an ape want?

I’d love to go out clubbing tonight. And yet, and yet, it will truly be a while until I can go again. I recently (just up until about 10-15 minutes ago) had a week-long scare of losing my passport. It is the only photo ID I have. My mom needs it in a few days to get our Medicare cards sorted out because we just got permanent residence and I haven’t had the guts to tell her I LOST MY ONLY FORM OF ID. But then I found it in the most obvious place – the drawer I use for my passport safe-keeping. I had HHRay search through his entire house for it, thinking I might have forgotten it there. He wasn’t happy when I told him where it was.

Anyway, I have vowed to not take my passport out of my house ever again to not have another scare like this one in my life – ever. This means I have to wait until I fill out and submit all the paperwork for a proof of age card. Also, money is an issue. I’m broke.

I’ve noticed how I always put so much more smileys in my online forum posts than any of the guys I’ve seen remembered an article I read a while back about how women always use more smileys when they’re talking on the internet than men do because we feel more inclined to make our emotions absolutely clear and that is sometimes difficult to do simply with words. In other words, a guy types something sarcastic, he’ll assume that the sarcasm will be obvious to others. If a woman types something sarcastic, she’ll put and at the end to make absolutely clear that she isn’t being serious and is not attempting to insult anyone in her message. I even do this in real life. If I pick on someone as a joke, I sometimes feel so guilty about it that I just HAVE to add “just kidding” before they get a chance to feel insulted. Otherwise I feel mean.